Blast to the Past
by pokerfiend1313
Summary: Jack majorly screws up his life. Luckily, he has a chance to go back and change some things. Really angsty at the beginning, but only the first chapter. A little humor in the mix too. Another result of my fairy tale fetish.


Hello! Wow, you lucky person, you! You get to read my story! I have to say that 1) This chapter is going to be really angsty, but the following chapters won't be. 2) I got a little carried away with making up weird names. 3) Flames will be ignored. And 4) I NEED HELP! I have a VERY rough idea for this story and I am in dire need of a co-author!!! If you're interested, LET ME KNOW A.S.A.P!! Thanxa bunch!  
  
Jack Sparrow watched in horror as everything in his life crumbled right before his very eyes. It seemed like slow motion as he watched his ship, his crew, and his love blow skyward in flames.  
  
He thought everything was perfect: he had his ship, a loyal crew, and finally he didn't feel the need to use women and drop them the morning after. He had fallen in love with Ciara Chaviva and he was planning on living with her for the rest of his life.  
  
But instead, he was sitting here, tied to the mast of _The Revenge_, watching his past and future smolder and sink down to Davey Jones' Locker. He had no energy left to cry out. The only thoughts in his mind were of revenge. In any other circumstances, he would have laughed at the absurd irony of the situation. Getting revenge on _The Revenge_. No matter. Eventually, he would make sure that this ship and it's horrible captain got what they deserved.  
  
It is true that somewhere along the way, Jack Sparrow brought this upon himself. A few years back, he had been very selfish and made some choices that he shouldn't have. But he was a pirate, and pirates shouldn't need to be cautious and altruistic. He sighed and thought about his past. If he could go back and change just a few things, maybe he wouldn't be in this predicament.  
  
"So, Sparrow. How are you feeling right now? Maybe regretting some things? You know, you could still have that junky old boat and your little whore if you weren't so damned selfish. If you hadn't messed with me, you wouldn't die a tragic, lonely, pitiful death by my hands." Captain Damion Malaneco laughed as he leaned over Jack's crumpled body, "Huh, how does it feel to know you've screwed up _SO_ badly that you've brought death to every single significant person in your life?"  
  
"I feel nothing," Jack mumbled. After hearing this, Malaneco laughed again and knocked Jack out with an oar.  
  
"Stupid git," Malaneco whispered and disappeared into the captain's quarters, finally able to sleep knowing that vengeance was his and Sparrow was suffering.

.....................................................................................................................................................  
  
He didn't know how long he had laid there, unconscious. A few hours maybe. It was night now, the sky blacker than the ace of spades and the stars twinkling in the distance. Jack glanced around the deck and found his only company was the moon.  
  
He wished he could change the past and erase his stupidity. Not only had he lost everything that was important to him, but once Elizabeth got word that her husband had been blown up with the ship, she'd be heartbroken. Will had just gotten word last week that he was the father of a newborn son, and Jack had ruined that. Will never even got to see his own son. He would give anything to go back in time and change things.  
  
"Anything," he whispered as he fell into a deep sleep.

...................................................................................................................................................  
  
It started as a faint glow. So faint, that Sparrow thought he was seeing things. He stared into the moonlit sky at the glowing orb that was leagues away. He had probably only slept about 45 minutes or so, and he couldn't figure out why he had woken up.  
  
He blinked. Was he going crazy, or was the orb coming closer? It certainly seemed that way, and at an alarming rate.  
  
It only took about 5 minutes for the orb to come so close that he noticed it wasn't really an orb at all, but a short, squat, woman in a pink ball gown. Ok, now I'm definitely going crazy, Jack thought.. He was just noticing that she was wearing gold spectacles when she zoomed so close she bowled right into him. She shrieked and tumbled into the barrel of apples nearby.  
  
"I'm going to kill Edwina! This is the last time I use her modes of transportation!" she mumbled as she brushed herself off and crawled out of the barrel. Walking over to Jack, she exclaimed, "You Captain Jack Sparrow?"  
  
"I'm no' a captain anymore." He replied sullenly, trying hard to ignore her fluffy purple hair at the same time.  
  
"Well, someone has their undies in a bundle..." she trailed off.  
  
"I 'ave a damned good reason ta be melancholy! I've jus' lost everythin' tha' was worth anythin' ta me!!!" Jack yelled angrily.  
  
"Oh stop feeling sorry for yourself. Are you just going to sit there and wait for death, or are you going to do something about it?" she asked.  
  
"What can I do about it?! "Jack was seriously losing patience with this woman. In fact, he didn't even know if there even was a woman beside him. He was clearly out of his mind and hallucinating.  
  
"Oh shut up! Didn't you see me fly here? Have you ever seen a three foot tall woman with purple hair before? Use your head, boy! If that's possible, do you think it might be slightly possible that I could help you out of your predicament? Why would I be telling you to do something about it if it wasn't possible?? Geeze, I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!" She exclaimed animatedly.  
  
"Sooooooo, you're telling me what exactly?" Jack asked bewilderedly.  
  
"What I'm telling you, is that I heard you were looking for some help. I'm your girl. You said you wish you could go back in time. Ta da! Here I am."  
  
"So, you're telling me you can take me back in time?" Jack asked with doubt clearly on his face.  
  
"No, I'm telling you that there's a 2 for 1 deal on batteries at Kmart," she said sarcastically, "_Yes_, I'm telling you I can take you back in time! Now, think back to when all this trouble began. What was the first choice that brought all this upon you?"  
  
Ok, now REVIEW! And I can't get the second chapter up until someone HELPS ME!!! So, again, if you're interested in helping me out, Let me know!!!


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